Isabelle Bitar, Spark Mentor
Spark is a weekly supportive mentoring program designed to meet the unique needs of children, whether they are neurotypical, on the autism spectrum, or developmentally delayed. The program focuses on improving socialization skills, impulse control, anger management, and self-awareness in a structured and supervised group setting. Within each Spark group, volunteer peer mentors are paired with clients, acting as buddies, social models, and friends. This supportive environment fosters the development of conversational skills, creativity, empathy, and engagement.
I've been a buddy for a year, but I've known about the program for a few years longer. My close friend, who has been involved in it longer than I have, introduced me to Spark. She always raved about how much fun it was and how much she learned, but I never fully understood the extent of it until I joined.
On my very first day, I was designated as a floater because I was new and had not been assigned to anyone yet. This gave me time to observe, and I saw the different ways the pairs interacted and the various approaches the mentors had. Some mentors were clear and concise when needed, while others used humor to make the atmosphere more comfortable. Despite their different styles, all mentors seemed deeply connected and secure with their pairs.
After a couple of sessions, another mentor and I were assigned to a 13 year old boy with low functioning, relational difficulties, impaired language and comprehension abilities. Initially, we weren't really connected; he didn't remember our names, recognize that we were his buddies, or engage in activities with us. However, a few weeks later, when I went out to the waiting room, instead of his caretaker urging him to come with me and asking him to put his tablet down as he requested a few more minutes, he saw me, stood up, and came with me. When we walked in and Dr. Sherkow asked if he knew who his buddies were, after a little hesitation, he said our names. We both felt so proud and happy because he had not only found a connection with us, but we had also found one with him.
Throughout the year, we watched his growth. It became easier for him to stand or sit with us during activities or icebreakers (a transitional activity that helps everyone acclimatize to the environment and provides a sense of routine). He answered our questions when we asked him and was able to express his thoughts more easily. There were many significant moments that stayed with me when we saw a substantial improvement. One time, we were sitting on the floor eating jelly beans after an Easter egg hunt. We asked him what his favorite flavors were, and he told us the orange ones were his favorite. I told him my favorite were the blue ones. He didn't really acknowledge my comment, which wasn't unusual for him, so I continued with the activity. After a couple of minutes, I felt a tap on my shoulder, and he handed me one of his blue jelly beans.
We saw not only improved social interaction with our mentors but also with the other kids. Months later, a new child joined our group, and I was reassigned as her mentor. One day, I was sitting at the table coloring between my new buddy and my old buddy, and his current mentors and I were making conversation with both of them. I asked my new buddy about the colors she liked and disliked, and after she answered, I turned to ask my old buddy. He answered me and then, of his own volition, directly asked my new buddy what colors she liked. I had never seen him hold up a conversation that well, let alone strike up one on his own. Then, when I asked him if he liked pink and black (the colors my new buddy said she disliked), he said, "...doesn't like those colors." The other mentors and I all looked at each other and smiled, excited about how invested he was in the conversation. This moment perfectly encapsulated the incredible progress he had made in social interaction and communication.
Reflecting on my year as a buddy in the Spark program, I realize how transformative and rewarding this experience has been. From the initial uncertainty and lack of connection to the profound moments of bonding and communication, I've witnessed incredible growth, not only in the kids I mentored but also in myself Each small victory, whether it was a shared jelly bean or a heartfelt conversation, reinforced the value of persistence and the impact we can have on each other's lives. I am more than grateful for what I have learned and I can't wait to continue to learn alongside my buddies.